What Defines Woman
Is Fear My Master
For as long as I remember, sociologist, physiologist, and a host of studies, have defined women, not by the quality of their mind, nor the shape of their bodies, or the beauty of their faces, but solely, by the size of their breasts. Much of the success of breast definition, is based upon the males unnatural attraction to large breasted women to the exclusion of any other personal or character trait.
Earlier in this blog, we have discussed passion, and how passion interacts with the erotic female mind together with the role fear plays in the erotic female mind. We have also discussed, earlier the construction of a female orgasm, noting that it is, contrary to popular opinion, mind based, not body based, and as such is to a very large extent, controlled by all events precedent, which have to some extent, traumatized the erotic mind. It is also worthy of note, to point out that what creates erotic trauma, varies significantly from woman to woman.
We also discussed else where in this blog, The Concept of Normal, suggesting that unlike what women are taught, no two women are the same, each woman is born with so call dark thoughts, and that no woman, will discuss those dark thought, even with their best friends for fear of being labeled, abnormal. It is in this dark spot in the formative female mind, that fear finds a fertile breeding ground.
When asked in a recent study, women responded like the echo of mans mind, they were what their breasts said they were. If very large, they were sexy, if very small, they spent their life's being apologetic for this glaring defect in their character. I will grant, given the male preference for breasts, size, big or small, breast can be an attraction to gain attention from the person of her choice.
If, fact, have women short changed them selves by their concentration on this single part of their anatomy, failing to note if there something else, their attention needs to be called to address. In an erotic relationship, does the quality of the relationship depend on the size of her breasts, the sum of her parts, or to the freedom of her erotic mind and do each of the parts make equal contributions to her pleasure. I will submit, only the fearless erotic mind, holds the key to erotic completion
The pleasure of a woman, is not defined by any single or collective anatomical fact, rather a woman is defined by her ability to control or eliminate fear. Fear, is often the unseen, unknown Master, which remember what she forgot, and like a third partner in the bed restricts and limits the minds ability to release her passion.
Considering the number of women who suffer childhood sexual abuse, abandonment, verbal abuse, rape and physical abuse, the number who escape erotic fear, is frightfully small. Therefore, every time she goes to bed, it is always a three way love affair. She, her partner and her Master fear. Until she comes to know that fear lives within her, she will never enjoy the release of her passion. Until fear is set free, or effectively controlled, her passion is like a ship without a rudder, and each sexual experience is a mental often subconscious replay of her abuse.
Women deal with the consequences of fear in many different ways, some abuse themselves through pain, to dull the memory of the event, others are so effected that sex is for them, a painful process, even in the mist of raw erotic need, while others, the greater majority, appear to have a normal sex life, their partners never realizing, their orgasm's are without reality, simply the result of a fine acting job on the part of their partners.
Regardless of the basis of their fear, the cure for each is to recognize fear exists, and try to isolate the cause of the fear, but in any case to know, the cause of the fear, was not their fault. Since society teaches young girls, that abuse is their fault, it is imperative, to eliminate fear, to know that whatever happened, was simply not their fault. Masters and Johnson, in their early sexual surveys suggested only 15-25 percent of all women, ever achieve a total erotic release. I believe, the number is far less than the 15-25% identified in the Masters and Johnson survey
I have seen a number of examples where passion was so powerful, that the woman feared ever being touched, knowing that the right touch, at the wrong moment, could set off a chain reaction she could not control. In cases where both parents were equal principal abusers, it is interesting to note, in each case, the mother is always seen as the worst of the two parents, even in those cases where the father was by far the worst of the two parents. Fear that arises from parental abuse appears to have the longest lasting effects
Often, it is just as hard to identify the source of the fear as it is to eliminate it, but the end of fear, begins with the recognition that it lives, controls, and dominates her life. Over the course of many years, I have found the best way to identify the source of fear, is to write your life story, which will make you remember, many events long forgotten.
In those cases, where there is no memory until after a certain date, that often means the mind has suffered a traumatic stress, and shut down to protect the child. While it is helpful to remember why, it is not necessary to remember why, provided the woman clearly understands that whatever happened, was not her fault.
While the number of abused men is not significant compared to the number of abused women, men tend to respond in a different but similar way to the response seen in women. While women often experience pain, failure to lubricate, or exercise control of their erotic response such that it never goes to completion (fake orgasms), men on the other hand simply can not sexually respond, period, and are therefore, much more affected than many women appear to be.
When the fear is identified, and placed in its proper prospective, then and only then, is the woman free to exist and to have a normal erotic life. Kill the fear, give life to the woman
