Free Counter

Eroticism vs Control

Virtualy all women, of all ages, validate their womanhood, not by childbirth, but by the value of their erotic experience. The range and intensity of that experience is impacted in many different ways, such as social norms, religious beliefs, opportunity, abuse, violence, fear and rape to name a few but collectively they form a very rigid system of control, sufficient to which denial of erotic pleasure is almost always the result. Given that woman achieves her finest erotic hour, when she is free to lose all control, it counters that the existence of that control limits not only her erotic pleasure but also her ability to love virtually all but her own children.

Control, such as in denial of erotic pleasure is usually a consequence of mental trauma occasioned by an act of sufficient violence or fear, to cause the mind to subdivide into the strong and the weak. Once that occurs, pleasure and the capacity to love is greatly diminished until such time as the strong and the weak are reunited.

Many women, who suffer from control issues, are not aware of its existence, but feel an emptiness inside often leading to depression, over eating, drugs and alcohol. Usually, they will place the blame of a failed relationship on their partner, and almost never, themselves because the strong are never at fault. The more intelligent the woman, the stronger will be the control.

The first step in blending the two or more personalities together is recognition that they exist. Once you realize they exist, you can become aware when the strong tries to block the weak. Finding a friend, male or female who is willing to help you identify the conflicts as they occur will be highly useful in resolving the divide between the two.

Once the personalities are blended together, and no other source of fear or control is present, the change in erotic intensity and pleasure is almost instantaneous.

Squirting and pleasure

Free Counter

Many women, will discover, at the height of their erotic release, they suddenly squirt spraying them and their partner with liquid, which instantly becomes a source of great embarrassment. Just the opposite should be true for to get to the erotic moment, where your muscles are so relaxed as to permit yourself to squirt, simply means you are experiencing a near total erotic release. The same can be said of the splinter muscle that controls the anus.

If a woman experiences any kind of release, it is vital that she view it as a part of her erotic pleasure and never ever as an act to be embarrassed about. If she chooses to be embarrassed, then her mind will automatically control all future releases, stopping each before they get to the point of loss of control,and she will never reach that erotic plateau ever again. If her partner has an issue with her squirting, suggest she replace the partner before trying to control the squirting. Squirting is a natural part of the orgasmic process for many women and if they are forced to attempt to control their squirting, they will effectively have limited their orgasmic pleasure.

Free Counter

Tears and Pleasure

Many a woman, in the mist of a intense deep orgasm, suddenly has a strong impulse to cry while enjoying pleasure beyond understanding. Most, in this situation find the conflict between tears and pleasure unimaginable thinking something is seriously wrong with them to have the urge to cry while enjoying an erotic orgasm of great intensity.

Tears and orgasms both are members of the emotion set of a woman, and they can perform, both separately or jointly to release an excess of emotion to great for either to handle alone. In fact cuming with tears is a sign of having done a sensational job in releasing pent up emotions. Sex after all, other than procreation is all about release, and there is no better way to let it all go than to cum and cry together

Mind Connection vs Attraction

Free Counter

Domination and Submission, in any form, is solely based upon a mental connection between Dominant and Slave. In such a connection, physical attraction, plays no role what so ever. From the mental bond, trust and mutual respect will soon develop.Where there is a mental connection, a physical attraction will ultimately grow and develop because it is grounded by trust and respect.

Physical connections, in any form, is a manifestation of romance and is the foundation of a vanilla relationship, never ever a d/s relationship. When one tries to create a d/s relationship based upon physical attraction, and not a mental bond, then the foundation of a d/s relationship, trust and mutual respect, will almost never develop, and neither the d/s or the vanilla relationship are likely to sustain the life journey.

Why Men are from Venus, Women are from Mars

Free Counter

Man, by the sheer nature of his being, is erotically selfish, and therefore, not equipped to please a passionate female partner, unless that partner chooses so share with her male friend, the differences between male erotic need and female erotic need.

As far as man generally understands, the sole purpose of women is to serve as his cum dump, and once that sacred act is achieved, both he and his partner are both happy campers. Woman, on the other hand, compounds the problem, by acknowledging mans sexual authority in silence and or agreement. When woman dares to suggest more is needed, poor man is totally conflicted because he has given her all any woman should ever need.

Consequently, understanding that man is erotically selfish and sexually conflicted, by operation of birth, any woman who does not take it upon herself to teach her lover what she needs has only her self to blame, because man, simply will not get it otherwise. The erotic education of man, must begin before intimacy begins, because all men, are not trainable. Best time to know that is before, not after.

Having said that, it is imperative that woman select erotic partners who can embrace the entire range of their erotic need including those dark fantasies, thy so love to keep as their little secrets not realizing that those secrets define their passion, not limit it.

Free Counter

Orgasm

The orgasmic process is not a physical response actually it is totally controlled by the mind and the quality of the orgasm depends on the depth of the mental stimulus, the absence of fear and the physical muscle control of the woman. The depth of the stimulus is a function of a woman's sense of erotic freedom, absence of fear and her relative degree of trust in the source of the erotic stimuli's

when the mind receives an erotic stimulus for any source, physical, mental or visual, or a combination of some or all, the mind responds by sending an increasing greater flow of blood to the vaginal area. as the source of the stimulus increases in intensity, the flow of blood is also increased to the point where the pressure of the muscles controlling the vaginal walls, the pc muscle, more commonly known as the kegal muscles, strain to hold back the pressure of the ever increasing flow of blood sent by the mind.

When the pressure of the blood pool, sent to the vaginal area by the mind becomes to great for the muscle to control, the muscle dam breaks or tears, and it is that release that the mind of a woman identifies as an orgasm.

therefore, to increase the intensity and duration of an orgasm, one must enhance mental erotic security, increase the nature of the stimulus and develop the muscle control of the kegals to their maximum. the sustained length of an orgasm is different for every woman but this master has seen it top 15 minutes. The reason, so many women either never have an orgasm, or never reach their erotic potential, is the presence of fear acquired from any number of sources. eliminate the fear, and enjoy your erotic potential.

Unlike men, whose mind must be 100% engaged for their cock to get hard and orgasm, women can have any level of engagement and still feel some response when the muscle relaxes. That is why most men are clueless when a woman has or does not have an orgasm because most women, never have a real one. To achieve maximum erotic efficiency, the woman must free her mind of all fear, if the process is to go to its intended conclusion.

Free Counter

PASSION

Passion is a gift, bestowed by the creator upon some of the created. Yet, unlike all other talents and gifts bestowed by the creator on the created, this gift no matter how excellently it is developed and practiced, is relegated to the recesses of the female mind, by acts of outrage, violence or benign neglect. Many different gifts are bestowed at birth, and almost all are well received. I.e. arts, intellect and sports. People who have these gifts are revered in their community and held up as heroes to both young and old alike. Passion in varying amounts is often a secondary of the primary gift within this talent pool and is generally seen as a positive addition to the given talent. I.e. She sings or paints with such passion. Passion, like any other gift is granted in different degrees in different people. In cases where the woman's prime gift is passion and no secondary gift is of any significance, she then constitutes a talent without an audience, for it is quickly evident that the expression of this gift is discouraged except by those who wish to prey upon her need to give. Why does society shun raw naked passion as a talent? Is it passions relationship to erotic sex, its need for sensual expression, its thirst for more, or its refusal to define gender? Might it be the inadequacy of the non-passionate people who, while jealous of the gift, seek to own and control those who possess it? Little girls who possess this gift are the most often abused because they cannot hide their need to give and there is always someone ready to use this to their disadvantage. When these little girls display their needs to one who does not desire to hurt them physically they are told that they are vulgar or nasty among other demeaning or humiliating adjectives. If she escapes abuse as a child she quickly learns to hide her true needs and tends to live in a false world. Often, she is given to believe that she is a freak of nature by friends, family and lovers. This makes her seek her inner self. In her effort to just fit in, she usually marries her opposite, the non-sexual, normal-appearing man who will reinforce her impression that she is not to be needed and drive her further into herself. Left to her thoughts, living in a passionless marriage, unhappy, and ashamed of herself and her feelings she often seeks the solace of destruction by any means necessary from drugs to excessive weight gain. The little girls who were physically abused as children learn quickly that their passion is not a gift but a curse to be hidden from public view. They often split their personalities into one or more parts to separate the good woman from the bad woman. This woman is often incapable of accepting real love because she equates the pain of abuse with the passion of love and no pain equals no passion. Split into many pieces she is left to let each part find their own way in the world, often with disastrous results. She is often the victim of additional abuse by powerless men who inflate their egos at the woman's expense. And all that needed to happen in this child's life was for a parent to recognize this gift and to help the child to understand it. The adult woman only needs a lover who will encourage her passion, not one who will place limits on her needs and desires. At some point in a woman's life, usually in her mid-forties, all women of passion come to the realization that life in this huge vacuum cannot continue and since they see themselves as damaged goods, they often turn to the control that d/s offers submissive women. Even here, the passionate woman is usually subjected to the same ostracizing as in vanilla life, and taught to be ashamed of her needs and wants. A Nymphomaniac, a term often used to describe a woman of great passion, is a myth since there is no such thing. The woman often called a nympho is one

who has never met the lover willing to accept and encourage her needs over his own. In her forties this woman has low or no self-esteem, does not like or love herself, is usually seriously overweight, is in a passionless or abusive relationship and equates abuse with love. To give this woman back to herself requires great time and effort since she may not understand that her passion is the cure. Since she has learned to hide it well, one must be willing to find it wherever she has hidden it from view. Her fears must be isolated and resolved. She must take control of her body and be willing to work on resolving issues that prevent her form finding pleasure in herself. Finally, she must find acceptance over all of her passion and needs with free expression and participation without fear or humiliation. Her mind must be freed to seek its own level. Passion in Conflict Passion and Religion: Women of great passion, whose passion has been conflicted or restrained by society, family or lovers, often find solace in other expressions and art forms. One of their other expressions is religion. For years we have wondered why the number of women in church so outnumbered the men, and the answer is to be found in the least likely place, between their warm thighs. Feeling a sense of rejection for their native erotic feelings and buying into the popular argument that the women who love passion are possessed in some way by evil, they often turn to the church. They turn to the church in much the same manner that they marry conservative men, hoping somehow that a religious experience will cleanse them of their erotic needs. The conflict that arises, in the mind of the passionate woman, between the thoughts of good and evil represents a powerful tug of war between the real need to experience eroticism and to experience spiritual salvation. For many women this is the end of the line, believing their needs, as an individual, must be so evil that spiritual relief is the only way. Women electing this choice, while noble, are essentially ending their life, condemning themselves to unthinkable frustration and unhappiness. The woman who cannot see through this conflict for what it truly is will also be doomed to a life of fear and uncertainty. While there is much support on the side of spirituality as the answer nothing is offered to her in support of her erotic needs. This, in my judgment, represents the worst of sexism. The inability to resolve this conflict will manifest itself in many other ways such as suicide, drugs, alcohol, and abuse at her hand or another whom she seeks for punishment. The lucky few see past this conflict as an extension of their passion not a conflict between good and evil. Religion is a spiritual need, much the same as passion, and as such does not have to represent a conflict or a war between the forces of good and evil. If in fact, God did make woman, then it follows that God made the entire woman, including her erotic passionate needs. Therefore, it follows that the only conflict between passion and religion lives within the minds of those for whom passion elicits emotions beyond their understanding and control. The argument framed by the supporters of women's liberation will never be won, until first, we free passion to exist without fear in much the same manner that the male ego has roamed the range and passion shall rule the bed. After all it is the woman's power which balances society and prevents it from the harsh reality of raw and naked physical power. Copywrited 9-1-2001 by bkdaddy4u

The Essence of Being

The nature of being, is defined by passion, which is the DNA substance of each and every living being. The prime reason for life, is to identify your passion, and give it the freedom and opportunity to determine your direction in life and its effect on those around you. It is essential to understand, that each living being has a passion, and many are hidden well.

Frequently, your passion does not match your desire and you will waste your life following your desire, while ignoring your passion. Sooner or later, your passion will deman attention, and when it does, you will hear the sound loud and clear and know this is a force you can not ignore.

Many will see their passion as useless given their social or economic environment, but a passion is a calling to give, and because it is a passion, it permits one to give for the sheer love of the gift. Whenever one gives for the sheer love of the gift, the gift is given with the pursuit of excellence, which in the long run will reder the giver, much accomplishment and admiration.

Seek your passion, not your desire, for when you pursue passion, life follows you.