Most people male or female, enjoy being told what to do, to one extent or another. People who join the military, clubs, gangs, d/s relationships and the super duper club of all, religion, each exhibit different forms of mind and physical control. The need or the desire for control is a character trait, hard wired into your brain at birth and therefore is nothing to be ashamed of or to fear, except the motivation of the person or group to whom you entrust your control.
Fearing your need for control is just a damaging as investing that control in the wrong hands, since a person who needs total control tends to wonder through life aimlessly and without direction. Those who are products of abuse, tend to choose abusive controllers, for the simple reason, their mind is conditioned to equate abuse with belonging and often, confuse it with love.
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2 comments:
very insightful, the challenge is how to find the right kind of control if one has a tendency to seek abusive controllers. the danger is that one mistakes positive control as being a variant of abuse, which is clearly counterproductive
Indeed interesting and eye opening.
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